You Wonder Who You Are....

Good day, all...Trying to stay warm in the coldest Chicago weather so far this year....-5 degrees!

I think I should offer myself a bit more completely here, lest who and what I am be misunderstood. I want very much to share more of myself with you than just the sexual part, even though I know how strong inside me that is...It's because that represents to me more than just the sexual acts themselves; it is a part of a lifestyle choice that I made years ago to be as free and unencumbered as I can be and remain able to contribute in the world. Since sex and intimacy are the deepest parts of our core, it stands to reason that all else emmanates from there. Accordingly, my own sexual attitudes are actually reflected in my attitudes about life and love. And I prize these words above all others: Intelligence. Awareness. Dignity. Openness. Encompassing. Creativity. Exploration. Nonjudgment. And above all, respect...for all opinions and stances, whether or not I agree. To my utter irritation, I have discovered a boundary or two since I began blogging that just drives me fucking nuts...but I have to accept those as well...I hate limits and boundaries as a rule, but I recognize the humanness inside us to see those places for what they are...not my cup of tea. And believe me, there aren't many....There isn't much I haven't tried, sexually or otherwise. I will share them as we go. In the meantime, I will share my own sexual beginning with you.

I began masturbating at ten years old. My kid brother and I shared a room and I couldn't let go of my cock. The first time I stroked myself to orgasm, I let out a piercing war whoop that woke him up. "What are you doing???" he said. Fuck him, I kept going. He watched me for a bit and then turned over in his bed, putting a pillow over his head. I stroked myself almost angrily, I wanted it so much. I came a multitude of times that night until I just couldn't stroke it anymore.....I lost my own virginity at fourteen. Fourteen. To my cousin...yes, it sounds positively Appalachian. It was at a family part -- lots of aunts and uncles and cousins and strangers and drinking, etc. My cousin was nineteen. At the time, I lived on a farm; she took my hand and led me out to the barn, up to the second floor. She took off her own clothes and laid down in the hay and began fingering herself. I was absolutely riveted, naturally -- I took off my own clothes and just sat there with a huge erection. She looked at me (keep in mind, there was not a word said this entire few minutes) and pushed me onto my back. She straddled me and started grinding and furiously rubbing her clit. Needless to say, it took about ten seconds for me to shoot myself inside her. I was always banshee loud from the first and my cousin laughed out loud at my vocal and orgasmic gyrations. And I couldn't understand why, when I was done, she didn't climb off. She kept grinding and moaning away until she was satisfied. My limited experience had not yet taught me that she was going for her own cum, too. We must have been there about a half hour, tops. When she was done, she climbed off gently...put her clothes back on....reached over and playfully squeezed my cock, which was still hard....and she went back to the party, leaving this young, untested stud to once again fend for himself....which I did, of course...:)

From there, I was on my own quest for sexual openness and freedom and to find those souls in life who felt the same way. I have always had a feeling that there are many, many more who do, and they are too afraid to explore. Well, folks, follow the torchlight, because I have fallen on my ass so many times...only to get right back up. That's what we do. The alternative is not exactly prime, you know.