Booby Traps Banned Army Cartoon

A fascinating look at a bygone time, circu 1942. PRIVATE SNAFU was made by Warner Brothers and was shown exclusively on military bases and in combat zones by the U.S. government. Its humor, risque for the time and never shown in public theaters, hinged on the bumbling activities of Private Snafu, voiced in Bugs Bunny tones by the great Mel Blanc. I hadn't seen this in years. Hope you like it.

Memoir - Part I

"I believe with all my heart that we are what we dream. If by grace or chance we reach it, the energy inside us creates another to follow."

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You see this at the top of my blog when you come to visit. It means a lot to me and keeps me young and energetic. Let me share with you briefly why. It has a great deal to do with my upbringing and my reaction (some may say 'rebelling') against it. This will be a running series of posts, because I feel the need, even at 53, to purge a bit of emptiness. I beg your indulgence....

In 1982, my parents divorced. I was living in Indianapolis in my own unhappy marriage at the time and beginning to seriously progress as an actor. One day, about three or four months after their divorce, I was visiting my mother. We were having lunch in her apartment, talking about whatever it was that my mother wanted to talk about...there's a good indication of my relationship at the time with Mom and Dad...when she said "I want to show you something." She went to a closet and pulled out a box. Placing it in front of me, she said "Go through there. You'll find stuff you've never seen, I'm pretty sure. Ask me whatever you want." So I did...Pictures. Letters to her from family I'd never met, and there are lots of those people. (NOTE: I say that because the extended family is SO big. Mom came from 11 children; Dad was part of a brood of 9. I sat down one day and counted up my first cousins alone...I stopped at 103. Most of those folks, I haven't seen in at least 40 years...but that's another post.) I saw my college diploma, which I gave to Mom and Dad and wish I hadn't, because it now had water damage from being in a box in the basement...I suddenly came across a document that caught my eye.

It was a marriage certificate. From the Wayne County Courthouse in Monticello, Kentucky, my mother's hometown. Each of their names were on it, of course, along with the Justice of the Peace. Two witnesses, probably people in the office at the time. It was dated July 26, 1980.

July 26, 1980. It means exactly what you think it mean.

Now common law took precedence, naturally, and so yes, they were still my parents. I was shocked but not surprised. My brother and my sister both took it much too personally; we all have our baggage. But why they felt that it was time to marry, when they had lived together for 29 years, was not explained. When I asked, Mom simply said "I don't know." I remember asking many times to both parents about their anniversary. Dad would always say "Ask your mom." Mom would repeat it..."Ask your dad." And since I was the oldest, and it was the early 50s, well, they HAD to get together. Abortion was not an issue for them, and I realized then why every once in a while, Dad would call me or refer to me to others in conversation as "the little bastard". And chuckle about it. There are other secrets which I never asked about, because that was a part of their own history. I am not privy to it, nor do I wish to be. Everyone, EVERYONE is entitled to their own privacy. Even Mom and Dad.

I swore then that I would not, if at all possible, hide from the world like that. Now yes, I have my secrets, we all do. But they belong to me and no one else. But I firmly believe that this was the beginning of my own attempt at openness in life. It means the world to me, and I still long to be accepted for it. That's why when you read me, you find viewpoints that usually chafe against the norm and still make sense. Hopefully. And that's why I continue to dream and grow and reach out. The little corner of the world in which I grew up, with its fears and hiding places, taught me well that being afraid is human. Allowing your fears to dictate to you what to do is also human, but something we all need to fight every day. That is where my own ambitions, my goals, my DREAMS have helped me deal.

If we don't have dreams, we die inside....To be continued....

Robert Redford in The Natural - The Final Homerun

In the midst of this cold, unfeeling Chicago winter that seems never to go away, I am reminded that spring training has begun; I often go to this scene from the wonderful Robert Redford film THE NATURAL. If you have forgotten what it's like to dream, watch this. The Randy Newman score, the crowd, the poetic sequence...I admit it, it's so utterly American...and one of the great moments in film...anyway, let me take you to a warmer day.

A Quick Memory

I lived for four years with a wonderful woman we'll call Stacy. Stacy was 15 years younger than me, but we had a spark that lasts to this day in our friendship. She was hot, open and willing to try most things I would bring up sexually. I was proud to introduce her to all kinds of things that she'd never experienced before, and it helped to hone her own openness and willingness to please and be pleased. I wrote a post once about her and a friend who, although they weren't quite ready for a threesome, took me to a hotel for the evening after a play I was in and we all three had a masturbation night. It was so much fun.

Today I was talking to a fellow blogger and she shared with me the first time she got really good head from a man. It reminded me of when Stacy and I met at a mall one day a couple of years ago, and she was with her latest beau...still with him, by the way...Stacy always appreciated what I taught her intimately, and she would always give me credit for introducing her to what loving and open sexual feeling was. We hugged tightly as her man stood by. She turned to him and said "Tom...this is Ron...this is the man who taught me how to fuck you!" It was quite funny, but I didn't quite know how Tom would take it. To his credit, he stuck out his hand to me and said "Hey...thanks a lot!" We shook hands and went to have lunch.

One of those snapshots in the mind that you always remember...

The Harem - The Village Idiot

The woman laid back, exhausted. A double shift at the club...not much in tips this night...and loud, unruly customers. "Fuck it" she said to herself and tried to fall asleep. Half an hour passed....one hour....ninety minutes....she couldn't find her way to sleep. She got out of bed and went to the living room. Hell, the kids can sleep, she thought, why can't I? I'm fucking exhausted here...She went to the kitchen and made a highball...maybe the booze will put me to sleep, she mused. She took a long drink and placed the glass between her legs..."FUCK!"The icy glass surprised her...but she didn't pull it away. She pushed it into her crotch, naked and turned on now by the cold. She reached in and pulled out an ice cube. She put it in her mouth; she tongued the melting liquid out and felt its path dribble down her chin...her neck...her breasts...She took it out of her mouth and, moving the glass, began to touch her clit with it. A groan...she flicked her clit with the edge of the ice cube, feeling the melting water flowing into her cunt, mixing with the arrival of her own sweetness..."Unnnhh!" Damn, that feels good, she said to herself. Little by little, the ice cube got smaller. Harder and harder she pushed it onto her now swollen clit, masturbating it as she did so often...she was a very sexual creature...finally, the ice was gone and only her fingers....and her nails...and her pussy...Oh, yes...this is how I fall asleep... cum until I HAVE to....fuck yes...But she wanted more.

She took her drink back into her bedroom. Opening her nightstand drawer, she pulled out her magic wand....the rabbit...she lovingly called it "Thumper"...She spread herself out on her bed and began to slowly tease herself with the toy...slowly....easily....soon she started feeling little jolts of turn-on from her little rabbit ears..."OhmyGod" she quietly exclaimed to herself...it built inside her cunt more and more...she fucked herself for a while...she got to the edge of her orgasm that she'd been working on for about ten minutes......and something, some impulse made her pull out...she stopped flat.

What the hell --? Why did I do that? RING!!! Oh, damn...the phone...She picked it up.

"Hello....Yeah, hi....no, it was a long day, I'm trying to get to sleep, but I just can't let the day go... Now? It's two in the morning, my kids are asleep, I can't just pick up and leave...what?....You wanna....oh...uh, OH....Well, yes....Yes, baby, I'm already naked....you're the one that has to catch up..."Things were picking up.She took a long drink and laid back. Maybe this would help, after all..."You know I got my hair cut the other day...yeah...it looks pretty good...Nah, you know me, I'm always cute..." She laughed at herself...a small hint of relaxing was finally creeping in to her. She lazily pinched her breast..."Ooo....Yeah, baby....I just pinched my tit...no, not hard....sure....I can do that..." She put her phone on the speaker function and laid the phone beside her. She took both her breasts in her hands and began to work on them in earnest. Putting on a show for the voice on the other end of the phone....Fun...

"Oh, yeah...that feels good...damn....DAMN!" She pinched her nipples harder now. She could feel herself being drawn into the moment, being a little whore on the phone for the voice on the other side...."Damn, yes...I LOVE it strong and rough...Yes...Oh, all the time. I work it good...What was it you said....OOO....Fuck!"She started slapping her breasts at the suggestion from the voice. She had done so before, but now it was a real stimulus...She made a sudden decision..."Okay...you just lay back there and jerk yourself....I will do this for you...yeah...Oh, I'll tell you
everything ....right up to my --" There, she touched her hard clit, throbbing now with an intensity she'd not felt for a while. " -- cum..."

She started telling the voice what she was doing."I'm rubbing my clit now....in a circular motion....goddamn yes, it's hot and hard as a fucking rock...Yes....Yes....Fuck, that's good....Fuck, yes, baby...!"She was getting into it now. And she liked it."I'm gonna put fingers in my pussy, baby...One...OHHHH.....I'm rubbing that spot...so fucking hot. JESUS....yes...yes...giveittome....fuckyes....ohgoddamn.....damn.....DAMN....two fingers .... I can fuck myself really good with two fingers....fuck that's nice...yes....fuck that cunt, baby...damn yes fuck it...ooo....ohhh...OOOOHHHHH.....YESSSSS.....THAT'S SO GOOD.....FUCKMEYOU.... FUCKME....YEAH....THREE FINGERS.....THREEEEEE......"

She started spanking her cunt and cried out with each one...."FUCK!!!....FUCKME!!!...YES!!! GODTHAT'SGOO-O-OD..." Then she filled her pussy with all four fingers and went at it hard and fast ...."fuckyesfuckmmeeee......yeah....yeahthatsgood....fuckyes.....damnDAMNDAMN.....!!! FUCKMEBABYCOME ON!!! FUCKME...FUCKYES!!! FUCKFUCKFUCKFUUUUUUUCCCKKK!!!!"

And with that, she reached her cum....she froze vocally and jerked hard in her orgasm...the phone fell onto the floor as she kept hitting that hot spot inside....she just kept going as long as it would last...on and on and on......

At last....sleep....peace for the night....sometimes you have to give something to get something....

"Open" Questions About Sex

Some questions on my mind -- I'd love your feedback. I have my own thoughts, my own curiosity, and I'll share them in a future post. But for now, it would be interesting to see how my friends and readers react.

1. Do you think that sex can be a part of a real and loving friendship without becoming
a romantic entity of its own?

2. Do you believe that an open sexual relationship can truly work with a life partner?

3. How receptive would you be to a partner's intimate suggestion which might be outside the
regular realm that you experience together?

4. Have you ever made suggestion of the same to your own partner? What was the reaction?

5. How important are your own intimate needs, in comparison to other life priorities?

6. A scenario: You and your partner are at a social gathering. As the evening progresses, you meet someone you enjoy. You find that there are sparks, chemistry between you. What would you do about your attraction and your impulse to act on it?

There are some things that I have always believed in with regard to a truly open, sexual relationship. Two of them go absolutely hand-in-hand: real, embracing trust in your idea AND in your partner...and broad, no-holds-barred, loving communication between you that you both understand and exchange. A third is the much-needed entity of compromise. Neither partner will always get what they want, nor will they be denied what they want if both will meet each other halfway. Finally, the idea of openness should be applied not only in the bedroom, but in all areas of life for any of it to work. The best way, in my belief, for a real, loving relationship to grow and moving forward is to be willing to look at love, career, family, friends, interests and the like in the same uninhibited, boundary-less way...When the limits are established, it will be because BOTH of you agree.

Touch Has A Memory

I preface this post by saying that I want to submit this to the blog charity we've just heard about. Hope you like it. It is based on a true story that happened to me.

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I came into his room with all the tools of the trade -- small tub, soap in a bottle, washcloth, water to drink for both of us, and an orange. I also had brought in a newspaper and a small gift, that being my custom. Inquiring about his background, I learned that he was an aspiring writer. And he was as the vast majority of creative, artistic types find themselves -- not financially solvent, living from day to day, paycheck to paycheck -- and in this case, terribly alone. He no longer had a full head of hair, naturally, and his manner was suspicious and quite fearful.

"Good morning, Teddy. I'm Ron." I stuck my hand out. He withdrew further under his covers, mumbling something I couldn't quite make out. I put my wares down and pulled a chair up beside his bed. I began to peel the orange and offered him a slice. He stared at me with empty, deep eyes. When he didn't take it immediately, I placed it on the nightstand on top of a napkin. I separated the orange as one does to eat it and left all the slices in a neat pile. Then it began.

"So how are you, Teddy?" No response. "At least the sun came out today. First time in about two weeks, I think." He simply kept staring at me from his position on the other side of the world. All I knew to do was to keep talking. And offer something that he might find positive. "You don't know this, but I'm an actor...and a writer. I've been very lucky. I know you're a writer, too." I looked about his room and saw the blue notebook. "Is this yours?" He followed me with his eyes as I ambled over to the other chair. "I'd love to hear some of your stuff, Teddy. Would you show me? Do you mind?" I placed the beaten notebook on the bed within his reach. I then walked back to my chair, sat down and waited. He looked at me hesitantly. He said "Are you making fun of me?" Calmly, I replied "No, Teddy, of course not. I'm a writer, too. I would like to check out your stuff, that's all. I'd like to hear what you have to say."

Teddy tentatively reached for his notebook. I saw for the first time the ugly disease he hid, a curse that had spread past his sleeve. I admit that my own feelings were highly mixed at that moment. He slowly opened it; lots of writing and artwork spilled out onto the bed. Teddy was deliberate in his search, looking for something specific. When he found it, he handed it to me to read. I asked him "Would you read it for me, sir?" He continued to push it to me, so I took it and read:

"All I ever wanted was to do my job. Be with my friends. Maybe even fall in love."

I stopped cold. I looked up at these eyes that now owned a sudden little spark. Not huge, but real. He quietly said to me "Read it again." And he showed just a hint of a smile. So I read it again. Once more, he urged me to read it, and I did. When I looked up from his paper for the final time, Teddy said "That's pretty good." "Yes, sir, it is. And it's a great thing to dream about." He suddenly laid back in his bed, more relaxed and aware that the man in his room was not going to hurt him.

"Well, bud, I need to do for you what I came to do. Okay?" He nodded affirmatively.

I filled the small tub with warm water and liquid soap. I soaked the washcloth in it. I donned my thin hospital rubber gloves. Teddy waited patiently. I helped him remove his thin gown down to his waist. And what I saw...it took my breath away in its sheer audacity. I hoped that Teddy did not notice my pause. And I started the bath.

I washed his arms gently. I soaked the cloth and easily bathed the young man's chest. As I did so, he closed his eyes and began to silently cry. Again I soaked the cloth in the soapy water and rubbed down his back. When I touched his back, his cry was louder, more purposeful. I stopped. "I'm sorry, son, am I hurting you?"

"No...You're the first man to touch me since I got sick. I've been here for months."

I froze for a few seconds, stunned at my reaction to this simple declaration, shared through the hardened nature of his undeserved pain. I heard through my own haze "Please don't stop. Not yet." I continued slowly as Teddy resumed his inaudible weep, the tears trailing down his crevaced face. I said "Read me something else." He took a deep breath and went through more of his papers. He found what he wanted. "I didn't write this. I just liked the sounds of the words. Like music..." And he then read to me...

"She walks in beauty like the night of cloudless climes and starry skies..."

Byron. The kid was reading the Romantics. And the tragedy was that he wouldn't be able to really share the romance in his mind, in his heart. He knew...and I knew. But he read the entire poem, while I cleaned up around him. I pulled up his gown back around his shoulders and tied the strings in the back.

I emptied the water and cleaned out the plastic tub. I washed my own hands and gathered my day's tools together. I sat down beside him and said what came into my mind.

"Thank you, son. I hope you have a wonderful day." I stuck my hand out. Teddy looked at it, took my hand and tried to shake it. He was so weak that he couldn't properly grip my hand. So I sat down and gave him a strong hug. He lifted his arms as high as his frail body would allow and hugged back, beginning to cry softly. We sat there for a couple of minutes. When we let go, he immediately put himself back under his armor of covers. As I walked to the door, Teddy said "I hope you come back."

Teddy passed away a little less than two weeks later. He was nineteen years old.

Now remember, this was 1994. The world did not know as much about AIDS as it does now, but it deals with the monster just as badly as in those years. There were the faces to show and tell much better than any writer could describe.

And the words he shared are now a part of my own credo in life: To do my job, to be with friends, to fall in love. There is no higher purpose for any of us.

John Keats, another of the Romantics, wrote: "Touch has a memory." From the mouths of babes...

Nitebyrd Tag

Well, folks, I HAVE to answer...it's just part of who I am...

1.) What's the largest thing you've ever put in your ass?


A couple of fingers from a hot woman.



2.) What's the oddest object you've put inside your body(ass/pussy)?


A bullet vibrator that gently touched my prostate. It was the first thing that drove me over the edge, insofar as that kind of stimulus is concerned...and yes, there was a woman there.


3.) What's the most public place you've ever had sex?


A beach in Miami in 1989. We didn't care and we didn't wait. And since I am naturally noisy and loud, we had to be careful. But it was a really fun fuck!



4.) Are you naughtier in your head than you are in your bed?


Probably, but I do my damndest to translate it all into reality.



5.) Masturbating - what do you call it?


All kinds of things -- jerking off, stroking, beating my meat...whatever works for the moment. One of my own strengths is in the language of sex, so I utilize it as often as I can.



6.) Would you, could you, in a car? On the highway? In a bar?


Yes, yes and maybe...never tried in a bar.



7.) What do you think is your most sexually attractive feature?


Two-fold -- my mind and my consideration and respect for my partner(s).



8.) What do other people think is your most sexually attractive feature?


To be honest, I've never gotten that from anyone, so I'm really not sure how to answer.



9.) Do you have an instant turn-on spot on your body? If yes, where is it?


No, not really. I go for it all fully, or I offer it to her just as fully. If I know that she might have a turn-on spot, then yes, I concentrate there. We aim to please at my house.



10.) Is there anything you want to do that you're too chicken to try?


Other than hardcore S/M (a limitation I discovered through a friend out here in blogland), no. I'm a strong, versatile lover with dominant leanings, who will nevertheless do what is necessary for her pleasure...and my own.



Now I have decided not to forward or challenge right now...I'm still too busy trying to get folks to come to read me! In the future, maybe. But if anyone has anything they want to know about me -- sexually or otherwise, and within reason -- I'm glad to answer!

The Harem -- Red

The pitch and yaw of the boat was lazy as they slumbered in the midst of a long nap. With her eyes still closed, the lady of the lake -- we'll call her Red -- felt through the covers where her Sailor Boy had cupped his hand around her round, ample breast and was squeezing it in his sleep. His massive hand was working her tit at a particular angle that got her excited; the nipple stood out proudly through the blue sheet of the bed in the cabin. She opened her eyes and looked up through the window at the crystal, cloudless sky. Red reached between his fingers and grasped that nipple in her hand, lovingly pinching herself. The first pinch startled her with how strong she was.... "OH!" With that, Sailor Boy opened his eyes. "It's about time." He'd been playing possum. "I thought you were still asleep." "No, and if you don't fuck me right now, I'm gonna be sorely disappointed." SB smiled. "Roll over on your back."

Red quickly complied, and SB began stroking his already half-erect cock. Didn't take long for the little pole to reach full mast, either, she thought and chuckled at her own joke. While he was stroking himself, she was fingering her well-manicured pussy in a rapid, purposeful way. He stopped for a moment..."Lemme watch for a bit, honey. You are so fucking hot!" Again she smiled and spread herself in a position that he could see more comfortably. DAMN, she said in her head, I LOVE THIS! Knowing that the man she loved got off on watching her masturbate and confident in the fact that she was going to get heartily fucked .... for the third time today. SB began to attend to himself a little quicker as the woman he wanted was showing him what she liked to do to herself. He watched her intently, unconsciously pumping into his fast with alacrity now. She watched him fucking himself and immediately went into a surprisingly rapid and intense orgasm: "OH-H-H-H MY GO-O-O-O-DD!!" Usually she was not so verbal, although moaning was constant. But now it grabbed her. She suddenly got up on her knees in the middle of cumming and was silent. But the sight...he was stunned and stopped stroking. She began to jerk and sweat and was very spasmodic in her uncontrolled movements...it lasted quite a while. All with her mouth open, a tiny line of spittle sliding down her chin -- Red wanted this one badly. When she had reached its end, she sat back on the bed, eyes wide open, breathing heavily, knowing that this was a surprise to both of them.

Immediately SB grabbed her by the ankles and was overcome with lust. Pulling her down to him, he roughly spread her legs and threw himself into her pussy. His cock pulsed heavily as he slid into her and began a rhythmic pumping, shoving in hard and pulling out slowly. Red moved her hips along with him...when he shoved in forward and hard, she lifted her pelvis to match him. When he pulled out easily, she held him as long as she could, using her legs by wrapping them around his hips. More and more they gave it to each other...sometimes looking at each other lovingly, other times closing their eyes and gritting their teeth in pure lust. Good fucking always makes you do that at least once. He fucked her well, bringing her to orgasm again in a wide-eyed, silent scream as the man just kept it going. It was suddenly very hot and humid in the cabin, so SB slowed his pace and said to her "Baby, let's go up on deck." Red smiled an evil smile..."God, I thought you'd never say so." So he dismounted; he went to the refrigerator and pulled out a couple of Mooseheads. He took her by the hand and, both naked and glistening, they strode up on deck.

They both sat quietly on deck chairs, sipping away, playing a little waiting game of who-gives-up first. The conversation was forced at first...a natural thing, since all they really wanted to do was fuck each other silly. But in time, it was a comfortable flow in their exchange. SB reached down to the boombox and hit play...on came Jimmy Buffett's "He Went To Paris". As he sat back
down, Red said quietly to him "Fuck it, honey. Let's just play." And with that, she reached down and began stroking him and shaking him slowly. Took all of a minute and the soldier was ready for action. SB took a long drink of his beer. While he did that, she took in some beer and then enveloped his dick in her mouth, full of cold liquid. "Oh, FUCK, honey...FUCK!!" She pumped her mouth up and down on his cock, swallowing a little of the beer as she went about her business. More and more, his cock responded and she could feel the little pulses now...he was hard and ready to do some real damage to her wet, dripping cunt. And she wanted him in the worst way...hell, she'd take him any way she could get him at this point. SB couldn't take the tease anymore. He grabbed her hair and pulled her off his cock. He stared into her eyes and said "I want you to bend over that railing." And as any good fuck, Red said simply "Sure, baby."

The boat's rail was right behind her, and Red grabbed the second rail, so she could be lower for his welcomed entry. SB took two fingers and put them inside her first...his turn to tease. He massaged her huge G-spot inside; it was easy to find. The moment he hit that spot, she started her moan. A low-throated, rough moan from deep inside. He went at her hard, so she could feel it. And again, it didn't take long. Red was in her element -- a wonderful setting, a gorgeous day and the man in her life to whom she could offer whatever he wanted, and whatever she felt. Fuck, yes.....Now the cum was here, and he starts talking to her: "Oh, honey, come on now. You can do better than that...yeah, that's it...make it cum...come on, baby, make it cum...oh, yeah... oh yeah, that's it...you love this....Christ you should see your face...you are so hot....come on, baby...give it to me..." And she did. A really wet cum, seeping out between his fingers, the constant moan in vogue. This was so much fun! The moaning was so loud and so steady that the boat next to them had gathered an audience to watch. Red had closed her eyes and didn't realize until she started her orgasm that she was the afternoon entertainment...after the initial shock, she saw how really freeing and exciting it was. A female voice yelled "Go for it, honey. Show us whatcha got!" In the middle of that cum, the folks on the other boat started to clap their hands in approval. "Fuck her, Boy. Give her some for ME!" a male voice shouted, and all laughed. Including the recipient of all the attention.

SB stood up behind Red now, all ready and able. Again, he threw his cock into her with abandon, partially from lust and partially from the urging of his friends. Red was breathing hard and laughing and moaning all at the same time. He fucked her steadily now, and he was not just thrusting in and out. He was working his cock in her in a corkscrew way, round and round, inbetween straight thrusts. Every slap into her lovely ass echoed throughout the cove. Through communication and signalling, there were now three boatloads of people -- thankfully all friends or acquaintances -- who were urging them on in their quest for gold. They both were sweating profusely now and neither of them really cared. This was a fuck to go for, and they both went hard. Red reached back with one hand and sunk her nails into his left hip, groaning rhythmically with every stroke. His response was to dig his own nails into the woman bent over in her animal way. When this happened, she cried out. When she cried out, all the girls yelled in approval "Yeah, honey! Do him as hard as you can! Back that thang up!" More laughter, more fucking, more, more, more. This was as much fun as they had seen in a long time. Red felt a cum forming from way deep inside and started her familiar "OHGOD!", as SB kept his relentless push into her. He reached out and grabbed her by the scruff of the neck and started this grunting of his own; she lifted to give him a better grip. And there they fucked...her breasts swaying and jumping off her chest, his hand gripping her in a loving vice, pumping away as if this were last call at Chuck's bar. Buffett was playing "Cheeseburger in Paradise" now, the uptempo now regulating their fucking. On and on and on....Forty minutes past....Then...

"OHFUCKOHFUCKOHFUUUUUUCKKK!!!" Both of them began grunting and groaning and screaming and holding on. The kind of fucking where both parties work their asses off for the pleasure of the other.

The audience got silent as their sounds continued their reverb around the lake. It was highly erotic to listen...it was even hotter to watch. The two of them collapsed back, he in a chair, she over the railing. He quickly reached out and grabbed her thigh in concern for her safety, dragging her back to her own chair. Then all in attendance began shouting and clapping their hands. SB and Red were too exhausted to answer back with anything other than a wave. She took her turn at a long drink and fell back into the chair. They both started to laugh. No one would ever believe this...

And this was just the beginning...:)

Stephane Grappelli plays Gershwin

Stephane Grappelli, the master of jazz violin, was 81 when he performed at the New Orleans Jazz Festival in 1989. His tone, his harmonics were always sparkling and soothing. And Grappelli played at the highest creative level until 1996 at age 88. It took his passing to silence him the following year. This is a Gershwin medley, and it is sheer joy, my friends.

After you watch the video, play it again...and this time, close your eyes...

Sex As A Healer

Feeling damned lonely tonight. A little preoccupied, I suppose, with things in life I need to face and deal with. And I want someone to hold onto, someone I can help be happy for a time, or one who would feel it an honor to help me find a calm in my heart on nights like this. And I am suddenly thinking of the latest post from Pocket Secrets...she has it right in this case. I have inside me a surprisingly strong intuitive nature, and I’ve said in the past that this kind of giving among friends and lovers and, in some cases, acquaintances is strengthening and even therapeutic. It’s a kind of affirmation of faith in people for me, I guess…the touching, the release, the sharing. Intimacy, sexual or otherwise, between two people or in front of hundreds (and that does exist) never changes.

We all want to know that we are valued. A quick way that we have found is in sexual, intimate exchange. There is nothing wrong with it, provided that everyone involved understands what it is. You can laugh, you can cry. You can watch, you can play. You can think and feel and reason. You can forget your problem OR you can concentrate on it with a renewed energy. You can share a great deal of your pain and your pleasure in such ways. A real favorite of mine is to put myself into an intimate moment with someone and, as we are fucking or sucking or stroking or watching or whatever comes to mind, we begin to talk about what’s on our minds. It is a wonderful masturbation exercise and an incredibly erotic thing to experience…to just talk about your day, for instance, while you are able to offer or accept an intense sexual pleasure of some note to you. I am in extreme need such an exchange this evening, because I can’t clear my mind. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve become more of a worrier, and not just of my own foibles. Bugs the hell out of me. I still retain my own sense of self, but I yearn, I absolutely ache for someone whose own comprehension of what life is falls into mine like a hand in glove. I’m tired of working so hard and seeing so little come of it.

I sit here gazing out the front door at the endless white that surrounds my little coachhouse. The weather has not been kind here in Chicago this winter. My old dog Jake lies quietly on the floor, occasionally opening his eyes and moving his head to look at me. There are pressures I’ve not shared that are staring squarely into my future. As stout as I feel that I am as a person, let alone as a man, I am afraid. Afraid that there are simply some mistakes in life for which one never stops paying. Afraid of judgment from others. We all have those spectres and we all have to stare them down at one point or another. I have reached a Waterloo with a couple of these issues. One is financial in nature, and it reaffirms my own hate of money. If I had become an actor for the money, I would have gotten out of the business years ago. Having said that, it is an entity we all need to move forward. So I’ll deal with it and accept the consequences in the best way I can. The other, of course, is sexual, and it’s much harder to reason out…such issues touch our very core, and we take remarkable care to avoid emotional pain in that domain. When I feel more comfortable about it all, I’ll gladly share with you. It’s not about being horny -- never has been. Never been about simply sex for the sake of it Those of you who know me, who have read me regularly can see that there are very few people more open and uninhibited than me…and I’m proud of that fact. Because even within all that positioning, I have found a moment or two that created a boundary.

No, it’s much more rooted in one’s desire to share with another what is on his mind, or what is alive in his heart, or what is important enough to reveal. There are just too few souls around us who get that, who understand, and who are willing to jump in, because it’s the human thing to do.

I just don’t want to feel lonely. Not tonight.