Questions, Questions...

My friend Nitebyrd has asked me to be a part of this tag, and it's a quiet morning, so why not? But I do wonder who Isabella is....

Rules to Isabella’s Naughty Meme of Firsts:

• 1. Please post these at the beginning of your meme.
• 2. Please include a link to Sex Talk For Men.
• 3. Please include as many sordid details in your answers as possible — if you haven't got any, make them up...(nah, I'd rather hear the truth)
• 4. Tag 3 people...(nah, you come and get it if you'd like)

First French Kiss

The first one I remember was that fateful year when I was 14, and everything happened to me sexually. Her name was Nancy, and she kept shooting her tongue in and out of my mouth like a piston. Kind of like having a thumb war, except it was a tongue fight.


First Boyfriend/Girlfriend

Everything for me started early. I was in sixth grade and Jane and I were already feeling each other up. And that young, your cock stays in locked position forever!


First Type

Nah...I have my ideals for what a woman should look like, but a real physical/emotional type? Never really had that in me. I always have been moved toward attitude, even as a horny teenager. She wants to talk sex, do sex, show me sex AND have intelligence and awareness...hell yes. If that's a type, then I just shared it with you.


First Time You Had Sex

Yes, I was 14. It was with....my cousin Susie, who was 19. My folks were having a family drinking party...yes, that's what it was...I lived on a farm at the time, and Susie just told me to follow her. I did -- right up to the hayloft. It was positively Appalachian. She straddled me and kept grinding her pussy on me. I orgasmed in probably ten seconds and stayed there, just cumming and cumming from time to time. I didn't know why Susie didn't get off of me -- she stayed for probably ten minutes or so. And when she would cum, she was one of those statues that simply froze and spasmed. And I remember that I could feel her cunt doing the same thing. When she was finished, she simply got off and kissed me on the forehead. And went back into the house, leaving me to fend for myself.


First Celebrity Crush

Never had one of those. I could always appreciate and fantasize, but I never had anything approaching a crush.


First Sexual Fantasy

From the beginning, my fantasies always had other people around me or involved with me, even as I tried to stifle those feelings and vision in my marriage, in other relationships...I was always afraid of judgment. The first one I remember was with two girls in junior high school. Both were athletic types with curves...well, as curvy as a young girl could get at that age. And it was in my bedroom. One would straddle me...the other would put her cunt on my face. And they both concentrated on my own pleasure... yes, a bow to chauvinism...Men have to learn equality with women, after all. It's never been a natural thing.


First Person You Fell In Love With

To this day, I am falling in love all the time, because I firmly believe that people have the ability and the desire to love more than one person at a time. But for the purposes of this question, I'd have to say in high school...her name was Theresa, and I never told her. We made out and groped lots in her car and in my car. And there was potential to share a great deal there. But high school being what it is, we moved on.


First Proper Sex Toy

Lube. I know it's not a toy, but it was the first aid and remains today my favorite tool to use on myself. I've done lots, believe me, on my nipples, up my ass, around my cock and balls...give me some slick, warm lubrication and either watch me go or do it for me. Either way, I am the loudest orgasm in mankind.


First Porn Video

1972 in college, believe it or not. It was a horribly put-together piece called...The Nun's Bad Habit...yes, you heard it here first.


First Sexy Lingerie/Sexy Briefs

Never wore underwear to bed. Always sleep naked. Got some French briefs in the late 80s and my girl at the time liked them. Don't like the feeling that boxers offer...they always bunch up and feel uncomfortable.


First Time Giving Oral

Freshman year in college. Absolutely loved it, and the girl I was with had never experienced it before. Every time she approached orgasm, she would bolt upright in bed -- she had never had an orgasm, either. When she finally allowed it to take over, she couldn't stop screaming. I left her dorm room with two girls standing outside the door. I smiled and they both ran in as quickly as they could and locked the door...After that, it was a secret thing to call Ron. I went down that quarter on four different girls, all of whom knew each other...I was pretty proud of that!


First Time Getting Oral

I was 17 and a junior in high school. She was 18 and we just found ourselves in a summer theater tent that I was working in at the time. Naturally, it didn't take long and patience turned out to be something I had to learn as time went by. But she was pretty impressed by the load I had and was impressive in turn, because she actually swallowed. The feeling on my cock of her swallowing was maddening, and I loved it. Love that dripping out the sides of a woman's mouth.


First One-Night Stand

Summer stock theater, 1975. By then, I had found myself with more than one girl who was experiencing something for her first time. She lived in town, and I stayed at her place. And she also had never had a man go down on her. Really tight, wet pussy, as I recall.


First Dirty Book/Dirty Magazine

This will all sound pretty intellectual. There were passages in Betty Smith's A Tree Grows In Brooklyn that taught me a lot. And I saw a spread in the January 1969 issue of Playboy that I remember fondly to this day. The centerfold picture show a woman in a room with a fireplace behind her, legs spread and real breasts. I beat off on that pic for about an hour.


There you go, folks. Some secrets and some history. You want to borrow this, please do...I don't tag people very much unless I have a purpose in doing it. I just continue to seek that woman in my life who is as wide-open and challenging sexually, politically, intellectually, spiritually.... any 'ly' you can think of. And I won't stop until I find her.

In the meantime.....:)

Taking Care

It seems like several of us out here have life interruptions that are getting in the way of more consistent blogging. Yes, it does have that habit. You've all heard me say many times that we need to take care of ourselves in the best way we can, so that we might be in a good place for the people we love.

I'm gonna ask you all a favor... And no, my cock is put away for now...:) I ask you to reach out to a couple of your favorites here that haven't been on the radar for a little while...or to one or two that are going through their own difficulties at present. And do it in a way that offers respect and intimacy and admiration. We all have our moments in which it feels like we are out here singularly and without support.

NO. Don't let that happen. We put out the good stuff...without expecting anything back...and it will come back anyway. I do believe that with all my heart.

This philosophy always requires active involvement. And that's not an easy thing, especially if you're not used to it. It's one thing to talk about the last fuck, the last BJ, etc. It's entirely another to talk about someone else TO them in a way that gives credence to those three little words "Love thy neighbor". Out here, we all live in the same house. So I ask you to help take care of our friends that we might worry about.

In the end, we all have to take care of each other anyway.

Interview with Kyra

One of my favorites, Kyra, has shared some questions with me to answer. Since she is one of the many huge crushes I have out here, how can I say no in good conscience? So here we go:

1. Imagine you are able to pick three people you know in or because of the blogosphere. Who would they be and why? Describe the meeting.

This is a little like asking the little kid if only one cookie is enough. I can answer this question in a myriad of ways, by categorizing or devoting entire posts to each person. So what I will do is to, indeed, pick three people according to my own personal (read: however we've exchanged between ourselves outside the realm of blogging) experience with them. All three of these folks are intellectually challenging, spiritually grounded and sexually HOT. In no particular order...and knowing that you, Kyra, are always in there somewhere....:)

FIREBYRD -- The woman has a brain to dive into that provides endless stimulation... a nature that shares and nurtures and cajoles all at the same time... and a body that a man could pound on forever! The naturally articulate nature she owns is something that I have always craved in my own life and, so far, have found little of. We share so many of the same attitudes, while I imagine that she would be willing to talk with me about pretty much anything, this being part of her professional leaning as well. THIS, friends, is quite a woman. Oh...and she's 3500 fucking miles away in England. Fuck....

NITEBYRD -- Here is a remarkably calm spirit that boils inside to be absolutely taken anywhere and everywhere. Her own sexual discovery has come comparatively late in life, and it's fun to follow. Our conversations have taken us from travel to marriage to open relationship to job to orgasm to laughing and crying about the rent and who knows what else. I am proud to say I have phonefucked this wonderfully wry little bitch and know that she's hotter for it!...Because believe me, I am, too...:)

A. SECRET -- ....and she does keep it well, let me tell you. Ladies and gentlemen, this could be the treasure that we all long for. She is fun. She's smart. She's very fuckable and wants you to fuck her any way you want. Who WOULDN'T like that, no questions asked? The one thing I always am immensely gratified for is her strong sense of loyalty. You remember the scene in Steinbeck's "The Grapes of Wrath", where Rose of Sharon ends up feeding a poor man with her breast milk? No, that's not a fetish of mine, believe me....it's an example of a friend who would literally give you anything if she could. Behind the mystery is one of the great people I know out here... Wow.

....and lots of others, I promise you...The Cheating Wife...JRM...KJ...the Lady in Red...all women I'd fuck with someone ELSE'S cock, they are that exciting....and little Button, my new friend...and I'd want to have a beer and be totally chauvinistic with the Southern Sage....and.... on and on and on...and if I didn't mention you, it's only because of how my mind is working today...

And then there's Kyra....:)

2. Imagine you are standing and watching your funeral. Who is there and what one word would they use to describe you and/or the way you lived your life? Is anyone missing and if so, why?

My funeral...I've come close to that a time or two...lol... This may sound like I'm dodging the question, Kyra, but I have to categorize so much in my life, in so many places, that I honestly don't know how to answer this. Who would be there? I would hope some folks with whom I have broken bread, bent an elbow and survived the wars of life to be a better person for having known them. What one word?....Oh my God.... how's this... Kindness... Kindness to people, to the things around me... To me, being kind and loving is actually more important than being wise...because kindness is, in truth, the beginning of real wisdom in a person. Who would be missing? Lots of folks who have either already gone on or are working...I couldn't fault anyone for that. I've said many times that you are no good to anyone until you know how to be good to yourself first. That is a self-advocacy that I preach and fervently believe, but have yet to master.

3. If you could pick any point in time of your life to go back and re-experience, what would it be and why? Would you do anything differently?

Many. Many. My first date with Cherrie....Working with one of my heroes, Stacy Keach, in "King Lear"... Being able and proud to actually give someone ELSE some help, because they needed it and didn't have to ask me....But for the purposes of this question, I'll be specific....February 4, 2002. It was my first jazz gig at a club here in Chicago. I had put so many e-mails and posters out, because I was afraid that no one would come. But they did. The place's filled to the gills. I had a quartet behind me. Everything I sang was right. Every move I made that night was spot on. It taught me that no matter how life ends up, I know that somehow I had the ability and the ambition to make things happen. A standing ovation. My first attempt at scat-singing, which is incredibly difficult. The audience was wide and varied and from all walks of life. And it was one of the great evenings of my life. I wish I COULD live it again...and bring you all along with me, just to show that I am what I say I am...

4. If you were not an actor, what would your profession be and why?

That's easy, although it took a long time to realize it. I would raise horses. I'm an old cowboy at heart. This profession would take care of a lot of dreams. I would have the specious ranch I want. I could raise thoroughbreds and then race them. I would have a strong, independent woman around me who would enjoy the open lifestyle that I crave. I honestly believe that this would be a kind of nirvana, because this would all be created out of CHOICE. And that, in the end, is what we all want...the freedom to choose what we like, with whom we like, for all the positive reasons we can summon.

And just ride....

5. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be and why?

I need to travel a whole lot more before answering this fairly. Ireland....the Southwestern US.... Spain....London....Hawaii....San Diego...on and on here, too. But in my experience so far, I'd probably want to pick Chicago up and take it to where I'd like to go. It's a great town. The Olympics would be served well here.

How's that, Kyra? Thank you, ma'am. I do have an examined life. Certainly an unfinished one. And always, endlessly ambitious for so many things. Once I'm able to find someone to come along for that ride, that is. 'Cause I'm tired of feeling lonely. In the meantime....one foot in front of the other...There's too much to be done yet. Ithzak Perlman, the great violinist, once said "Sometimes the artist's task is to find out how much music he can play with what he has left."

Indeed.